This past weekend, the Halcyon Home held the Hope Music Fest to raise money and awareness for Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

Earlier last week, many of our readers saw the statistics posted in our editorial about domestic violence. If you’re like me, you assume intimate partners typically refers to spouses or possibly those engaged. However, that’s not always the case. Partners don’t even have to be intimate; they can be someone you’re casually dating who makes you feel loved.

I grew up in a household where voices were rarely raised and I think I can count on one hand the number of true “arguments” my parents had. I know I’m incredibly lucky and not many can say this.

Knowing that, I had never seen true domestic violence or abuse. I thought it happened when men physically hit their wives. But, while in college I quickly learned abuse comes in many shapes and forms.

During my freshman year I befriended this girl who we will call Hannah for the sake of the column.

Hannah and I did everything together. Naturally, that summer we needed to find a reason to see each other and a Katy Perry concert was coming to Atlanta. We decided to go all in and bought floor tickets. While visiting her for the concert, Hannah informed me she had a new boyfriend. I was instantly excited. All we wanted for each other was to find love and get our degrees.

Hannah didn’t say much about her boyfriend, but while we were deciding what to wear, she had to send him pictures to make sure it was okay to wear that top. He nixed multiple outfits until she was down to one shirt left. I finally stepped in and told her she looked beautiful and that we had to go.

She wasn’t herself at the concert, she kept getting incessant texts from him. On the way home, I became really dubious of him. She told me to be quiet and let her do all the talking when she called. He was furious, screaming that she didn’t send pictures at the concert to make sure no guys were around and he was now convinced we must’ve been dancing with other guys and lied to him.

I wanted to remind him this was Katy Perry and she didn’t really attract a lot of male fans, but I was asked to stay quiet.

She began crying, begging him to forgive her. I was really upset; this wasn’t Hannah and I didn’t like how he talked to her.

She said he just really loved her and to leave it alone. I left the next day feeling uneasy, but she said she was going over to his house to make up.

That afternoon her mom posted on Facebook that Hannah had broken her wrist after falling at her boyfriend’s house, but was now on the mend.

That’s when I knew Hannah’s boyfriend was abusing her. There was no fall; anyone who had been on that call the night before and heard his anger would’ve known.

She declined my calls for the rest of the summer and when the time came to return to school, she dropped our sorority. She said he didn’t feel comfortable with her going to date parties with random guys.

Then, he moved to Tuscaloosa and into her apartment. He convinced her to block all our numbers, saying we only corrupted her.

It was a classic isolation tactic.

By second semester, she dropped out of school at his suggestion.

I called her mom, who was also terribly worried, but it was no use. We were too late; he got her pregnant and convinced her to marry him.

I’ve never heard from her or seen her again.

I reflect on that often. Domestic violence can happen at any age and at any stage in the relationship. I wish I had done more, I wish I had said something sooner and now I have to live with that.

If possible and not dangerous to the victim, I implore you to speak up on behalf of your friend and check on them. Say something before it’s too late. If you don’t, you’ll never forgive yourself and you’ll always wonder if things would’ve been different if you did.