Friendship, like many other words, can mean one thing to some people and something different to others. Google (AI) defines friendship as “in its simplest form, is a relationship between people who care about and support each other. It’s a bond built on mutual affection, trust, and shared experiences, often involving activities, celebrations, and mutual understanding.” “Key aspects of a strong friendship include trust, honesty, compassion, and the ability to be oneself without fear of judgment.” (Thrive Global) “It’s a voluntary bond where people are concerned with each other’s needs and interests.”

I have had many “friends” over the years I have been on planet Earth. My first real friend that I still have a relationship with is from my early elementary school days. Our mutual love for horses gave us numerous opportunities to be together. Mucking stalls in exchange for riding time at our local stables (since neither of us had an income source at the time) is still a wonderful memory. Barb ended up owning numerous horses and has a small farm she has maintained since her working years as a teacher. Our family moved south to Florida, so I never got to own my own horse, but my sister Jan (six years younger), who also loved horses, owned several, and I got to ride some when I came home from college.

As I was pondering this subject, I realized that I have only a small handful of friends that I have known for most of my adult life, but as I think of each one of them, they fit the definition above of “strong friendship”. I may only see or talk to them every once in a while for many reasons (location being the main reason), but when we get a chance to catch up, we feel very comfortable around each other.

Many of my friends have come into my life for a season (and a reason), and when that season is over, we realize that we may not ever have that kind of relationship going forward, and it feels okay. I have many fond memories of seasonal friends with whom I got to do life with for that time.

I have a few friends that I love doing life with in this season of my life. Most of them lead very busy lives and have families, but we find the time to get together because we value each other’s friendship. With most of them, it’s a phone call or a video visit because they don’t live here in my town. Some of these friends, both local and distant, purpose and schedule our times together, so that we don’t go too long without communicating. I value these friends enough to want to interact with them as often as possible.

Many of us have family members that we consider friends. Both of my sisters are active and involved with their own families, but when all three of us are in town, we try to get together, and we also usually communicate (text) daily. If we are all three healthy, we have had seasons where we would walk together. Our interests are very different, but we catch up over coffee, a meal, or a long walk.

Google offers some interesting thoughts about friendship. There are certainly different types or levels of friendship, including “acquaintances, casual friends, close friends, and lifelong friends,” which I have mentioned above.  Core elements of friendship include things like “mutual care and support – they are there for each other in good times and bad, offering encouragement, empathy, and a listening ear.” It includes “trust and honesty – where individuals feel safe to be open and vulnerable with each other.” Many times, friends “enjoy spending time together, engaging in hobbies, conversations, and shared experiences.” “A good friend accepts you for who you are, flaws and all, and respects your individuality.” “Friends are dependable and stand by each other, offering support when needed.”

Several other insights I gleaned from my research that are worth mentioning include the importance of friendship. “Friends provide a sense of belonging, reduce loneliness, and offer support during difficult times.” “Having strong friendships is linked to greater life satisfaction and happiness.”

Let’s face it, sometimes there are challenges in friendships! There are three areas that I want to mention. “Like any relationship, friendships can face challenges and require effort to resolve disagreements.” Sometimes friendships can end for various reasons. “This can be painful and require time to heal.” Third, “It is important to nurture different types of friendships and prioritize those that are most meaningful to you.” I think keeping these thoughts in our minds can help us persevere through the challenges that will come to all of us as we live our lives. I have worked through several relationships that had gotten strained because of our personality differences and/or our personal preferences, as well as our perspective about the issues at hand. I have had several friendships end for the very same reasons.

Any relationships that I have had that ended with unresolved differences have put me in a place of examining my own heart. I never want a relationship to end where I have not dealt with my own heart issues. Unforgiveness, if left unresolved, can lead to a root of bitterness which scripture says “can defile many.” Forgiveness releases both the offender and the one offended. It does not necessarily result in the restoration of the relationship. Sometimes that is not possible or even unwise because of all the circumstances around that relationship. If I cannot come to a place of resolution by myself, it is wise to engage someone who can look at the situation from a different perspective and perhaps bring the necessary insight to bring closure properly.

Here are a couple of quotes that might encourage you to have or make good friends. “A friend is one of the best things you can be and the greatest things you can have.” (Prevention Magazine) “A true friend is someone who is there for you when he’d rather be anywhere else.” (Country Living Magazine) How about this one? “A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked.” (Prevention) An old saying I have quoted many times: “Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver, but the other is gold.” I am very rich indeed because of the many friendships I have had over the years. Yes, I have a treasure chest full of silver and gold!