Does anyone use the word Grandpa anymore?

It used to be a common word. There were dads and kids, and somewhere in the back, passing out gum was grandpa.

He was a short little fellow with a couple of tufts of gray hair hanging on for dear life right above his ears.

You could always tell which old man in the crowd was the grandpa. He was the one with the big grin on his face and the pants pulled up above his waist.

But it seems the term grandpa has somehow gone out of style.

I was at a kids’ program at the library this week with my precious little granddaughter, and a man and a small child were sitting beside us.

As the program was about to start, the little fellow looked up at the man and called him Gouda. Yeah, like the cheese.

Okay, it was kinda’ cute, but how did we go from Grandpa to Gouda in less than fifty years?

I know parents want their kids to call their grandparents by chic, cool names. The same parents who named their children Mowgli or Blowtorch.

I guess if your child is named Sweatband, it’s not a stretch for them to call their grandfather Yum-Yum.

It can be a little confusing when you’re in a big group of toddlers and every kid is calling out for their grandfathers.

“Hey, Grandoddy!”

“Look at me, Pee-Paw!”

“I’m choking on a Slim Jim, Gumpy!”

You don’t know if you’re at a toddler program or in a Pixar movie.

When I was growing up, we always called my grandfather Pippy. I don’t know where that term came from. Maybe from the back of a cereal box or a Looney Tunes cartoon.

So, that’s what my granddaughter calls me. Pippy.

Not Be-Boo or G-Paw.

And don’t even get me started on names for grandmothers. That’s where things really get weird.

I have a friend who called her grandmother, Mee-Maw or Ma-Moo. One of those.

But I guess both of those are better than Mu-Mu, Tu-Tu, or Gram Cracker.

Why is it so hard for kids to just call their grandparents Grandpa and Grandma instead of Grump-Goo and Glam-Dam?

This is the woman who gave birth to seven children before epidurals were invented. And fed a family of nine with a pan of cornbread and three chicken necks.

She deserves to be called grandma, not Granny McFanny.

I guess that as the world gets weirder, so will the names for grandpas and grandmothers. Who knows what we may be calling our elders in a hundred years.

Maybe Ploop-Poop and Grood-Goop.

We can stop this madness by having our kids call their grandparents by a more respectful term.

I would suggest Pippy.