Well now, don’t that just beat all? A new study from Answering Service Care reveals that the Southern accent is officially the friendliest in the U.S. A third generation family-owned business, Answering Service Care has been serving organizations in every industry ranging from banks to attorneys to funeral homes and a lot in between since 1974. I tell you all this to say they seem to know what they are talking about when it comes to – well – talking.

The company just released a study of over 2,000 U.S. respondents that reveals a clear pattern in how accents influence first impressions, customer experiences and even career opportunities. When asked which accents they found the nicest in a customer service setting, respondents said the Southern accent topped the list, beating out Hawaii.

Respondents also found the Alaskan accent as the least annoying, with only 3% of people calling it annoying. That, I suspect, is because only 3% of us have ever talked to someone from Alaska.

One in three people say they find the Southern accent — most commonly associated with Louisiana, Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, Texas and South Carolina — “friendly.” Not splitting dialectal hairs here, but Louisiana isn’t your ordinary Southern Speak. They talk Cajun English in Louisiana: “Lagniappe” for “something extra.” “Fais do-do” for “late-night dance party.” “When you went?” for “When did you go?” “Laissez les bon temps rouler!” for “Let the good times roll!”

Folks may talk like that in Acadia and Lafourche but they don’t talk like that in Donalsonville or Rockmart or any other city in Georgia that I know of. But, as they say in Pointe Coupée, “On ne sait jamais.”

Hearing these results warms my heart and represents real progress. There was a time not all that long ago when our Southern accent was known as a Southern drawl and snoots looked down their noses and made fun of us. I spent a lot of my career traveling to such far-flung outposts as New York and Boston and Los Angeles where I reminded the local denizens that it could be that they were the ones who talked funny, not us. I never heard a Southerner say “Fuhgeddaboudit” or “Pahk your cah at Hahvud Yahd” or “I am so gnarly and stoked, brah.”

My daddy used to say that because we talked slow, those from other parts assumed we were slow thinkers, as well. Far from it. He said they would tell you exactly what they were thinking without thinking. We would tell you what we wanted you to know when we were ready for you to know it and not before. Information is power and as long as I have it and you don’t, I’m in control. It’s a Southern thing.

Daddy also said we wasted a lot of money painting stripes down the middle of our roads because nobody ever drove north out of Georgia. They all came south. And stayed. But that’s another story for another day.

The survey said the role that accents play in customer service is very important. Friendly or soothing accents can enhance the customer’s experience, making them feel reassured and cared for. Meanwhile, accents that come across as aggressive — or even difficult to understand — may lead to frustration and affect customer satisfaction. (“Hey, Bozo. You wanna talk about my freaking attitude? Fuhgeddaboudit!”)

But watch your attitude if you get crosswise with a customer representative from around these parts. You will be sliced and diced before you know it. (“Now darlin,’ don’t go having a hissy fit. I’m fixin’ to tell you that dog won’t hunt. Bless your heart.”)

I am glad to read about and report on how accents can impact public perception and that people like the way we talk down South. But I was surprised that India wasn’t mentioned, because that seems to be where all my customer inquiries go. Speaking of accents, I can’t understand theirs and they can’t understand mine and, therefore, nothing gets done except we both get frustrated. If Answering Service Care is reading this, please think about opening a New Delhi branch. Thank you.

As for my own efforts at customer service, an accent is not needed, although I have a good one. My effort consists of responding to my emails and trying to convince angry RITNOs (Republicans in Trump’s Name Only) that I am not a liberal weenie and trying to convince angry liberal weenies I am not a RITNO. How do they think I am doing? Fuhgeddaboudit.

You can reach Dick Yarbrough at dick@dickyarbrough.com or at P.O. Box 725373, Atlanta, Georgia 31139.