Have you heard the one about Donald Trump calling out Sen. Lindsay Graham? No? OK. It goes a little something like this.

Republican presidential candidate/professional entertainer Donald J. Trump was in Bluffton, South Carolina, at a campaign stop the other day. Trump mentioned to his supporters that he’d heard that Graham had called him a jackass for questioning Sen. John McCain’s status as an American war hero. What happened next was one of those magical Republican moments. Maalox moments.

For Reince Priebus – the chairman of the Republican National Committee – these days are long and hot. Priebus could only watch helplessly as Trump – a man who excels at upsetting stomachs – speed-bumped Graham.

Said Trump about Graham: “I mean, I got a little dose of it. I was coming up, and I see your senator. What a stiff! Lindsay Graham. By the way, he’s registered zero in the polls. Zero! He’s on television all the time. This guy, Lindsay Graham – a total lightweight. Here’s a guy who couldn’t get a job in the private sector, believe me. Couldn’t get a job. And then, I watch this idiot on television today and he calls me a jackass! I’m trying to be nice, I’m working hard to be nice. I have some guy that is hitting me, like, hard. The reason they’re hitting me is when you register zero in the polls, what the hell, you have nothing to lose. I said to myself, it’s amazing, he doesn’t seem like a very bright guy. He doesn’t seem as bright as Rick Perry. I think Rick Perry is probably smarter than Lindsey Graham.”

Trump then regaled his adoring audience with his recollection of a conversation he had with Graham previously. According to Trump, Graham reached out to ask the Donald to mention his name during Trump’s next visit to the Fox News Channel. Trump stated, “So Lindsay Graham says to me, please, please… whatever you can do. I said to myself, is this guy a beggar? He’s begging me to help him get on ‘Fox & Friends.’ So I said OK. I told him I would mention his name. And I found the card he gave me that day. I wrote his number down. Let’s try! 202-xxx-xxxx. I don’t know. It was 2-3 years ago, so maybe it’s an old number. So … give it a shot.”

Whoa. Did Donald J. Trump dox (publicly give out) Lindsay Graham’s personal cellphone number to the masses? Why, yes. Yes he did.

Priebus, would you like your Maalox on the rocks? Or neat?

Of course, Trump’s throwing of Lindsay Graham under a school bus was preceded by his throwing of McCain under a Mack truck.

Last Saturday at the Family Leadership Summit in Iowa, Trump insisted, “He (McCain) is not a war hero. He is a war hero because he was captured. I like people who weren’t captured.” Trump’s half-hearted attempt to walk back his comments on McCain fell flat, especially when you consider that days earlier, Trump had described McCain as “a dummy” who “graduated at the bottom of his class at the U.S. Naval Academy.”

Yikes!

RNC personnel, may I recommend Pepto-Bismol? It’s pretty effective against heartburn.

There’s also what the real estate mogul said about Perry, the former Texas governor. Trump’s Twitter war on Perry included these posts: “@GovernorPerry – in my office last cycle playing nice and begging for my support and money. Hypocrite!” And: “Rick Perry did an absolutely horrible job of securing the border. He should be ashamed of himself. Gov. Abbott has since been terrific.” And Trump saved this tweet for his microphone drop: “Perry doesn’t understand what the word demagoguery means. He should be forced to take an IQ test before the first GOP debate.”

Aw, man.

More Milk of Magnesia, Mr. Priebus?

Trump’s red-on-red verbal spree isn’t decreasing. It’s increasing. The Donald has taken trolling to infinity and beyond. He’s insulting the 2016 presidential candidates with extreme prejudice in front of their constituents – to standing ovations. King Trump does not subscribe to Ronald Reagan’s mythical 11th commandment: Thou shalt not speak unkindly towards a fellow Republican.

The Donald cannot be controlled or reasoned with. Priebus found that out two weeks ago when he called Trump on the phone and asked him to “tone it down.” Trump immediately chastised the RNC’s chairman. Publicly.

Donald Trump has executed a hostile takeover of the Grand Old Party. He’s all bark, no bite. All dollars, no sense. When folks see Trump, they see the GOP.

What if Trump carries out his threat to run as a third-party candidate for president? Game over, Republicans.

RNC, you have a huge problem. His name is Donald J. Trump. Good luck, Mr. Priebus. Take time out for a homemade Maalox milkshake. You’re going to need it, sir.